The Secret to Well Behaved Kids

"Don't be afraid to impose rules and structure, and don't try to be your kids' best friend. They can have lots of friends, but only have one mom and one dad."
— Rabbi Shmuley Boteach

People ask me all the time how do you get your kids to behave so well?  Like there is some big secret to being a parent that my husband and I are keeping to ourselves.  I hate to break it to people, but there is NO big secret to raising well behaved kids.  Just do what you know needs to be done.  Discipline your kids when they need it, talk to them about how they feel, teach them the value of work, teach them how to be respectful, and for goodness sake teach them some manners.  I don't understand why it's so hard for parents these days to BE parents. 

From now on when parents ask me how do I get my kids so well behaved, I'll ask one question.  "Are you best friends with your kids?"  If they say "Oh yes totally".  Then I'll say, "WRONG!  If your kids at one time in their lives don't hate you or want to run away, or think their lives are unfair because of you, then you are not being a parent.  You are being their friend.  And last time I checked I don't give a crap what my friends tell me to do, I'll do whatever the hell I want!"

Being a parent isn't easy.  It's the hardest thing in the world to know that what you do and how you shape these little people is the difference between whether they are "normal" and well adjusted OR just plain screwed up in the future.  Even with well behaved kids, I still wonder if they are not screwed up in some way or another.  Who knows we will just have to see.  I'll never stop trying though.  Not ever!